Dumb People Are Next
link Denmark Introduces ‘Fat Tax’ on Foods High in Saturated Fat – ABC News.
The mind races at the likely repercussions from this new law. Today it’s a tax on fat, but the zealots will want to push it more and really get to the root of the problem. Cows. There will soon be a tax on cows, or even a push to outlaw them. Taxes will also spike for any who dare to operate in the dairy industry since they will be seen as enablers to cows. That might actually not be much of a hardship anyway since the world is moving towards the farming of cannabis as a more healthy and benign farm crop. In addition, it’s well known that cows give off gasses that contribute mightily to Global Warming, so banning cows can actually have a two ‘fer benefit.
Once this train of logic gets going however, it’s a sure thing that the next areas to be targeted are clothing manufacturers and those industries that make fabric. There will be a tax on plus sized garments so that fat people won’t be able to afford to buy clothes. Of course you can’t make fat garments illegal, that would be preposterous. But you can make it difficult for fat people to be seen in public. Not that this doesn’t have benefits. We’d no longer have to look at Michael Moore on TV for example.
Immediately, we can think of new companies that spring up to capitalize on the anti fat people dictates, especially if there’s new financial incentive. To help people eat less, companies will start to market two tined forks. This will make eating of large volumes of food difficult and the added strokes required to eat the same volume of food will actually be an aerobic exercise as well. Sheer genius. By the same token, they will make smaller plates and smaller cups, since larger plates and cups would of course carry punishing taxes. There will be pictures of grossly obese people printed on packages of ice cream and soda pop as public service warnings.
The trend will be towards making food products that are less and less appealing to the palate, making eating less of an enjoyable pursuit. As society progresses, the proliferation of food pellets will be the norm as people ingest the optimal amount of nutrients according to a national standard. Rogue elements of society would still eat real food, but they will be pariahs as they huddle outside of office buildings eating sandwiches and enduring the condescending glares of law abiding citizens as they pass by.
Of course, the transition away from butter will not be complete without changes in popular phrases and idioms as well. No longer will politicians use the phrase, “butter not guns” and in business, you’d have to “margarine somebody up”. Now you can only say, “smooth as unsaturated vegetable product”.
It’s only a matter of time before they get to cheese and Oreos.