As IF Times

link Tiger Woods photographed outside Mississippi rehabilitation centre where he is reportedly being treated for sex addiction | Herald Sun.

Of course we don’t know exactly how this came about.  How was the decision made to identify Tiger’s “condition” as an affliction that needs treatment?  Are we to believe that:

a) Tiger recognizes that because of his fame, fortune, high powered friends and exalted status among athletes,  getting access to willing young women is a horrible burden of the business and is a bad thing

b) His wife says that the above is a bad thing

c) His sponsors say that it’s a bad thing especially if he gets caught

d) His mother gave him the ol’ ear twist

e) His current girlfriend thinks he should go so she can be exclusive

f) His business managers told him to go in order to salvage whatever status he may have as a sympathetic character and to pave his way back to the tour so they can all make money again.  It certainly can’t be Tiger’s fault if it’s a disease.  This horrific ailment which co-incidently only afflicts young men in the sports and entertainment industry with lots of fame and available money, must be appropriately treated.

Of course there is precedence for this.  David Duchovny, Michael Douglas and Charlie Sheen all had to live through this horror before being admitted to treatment.  Sadly we have seen the tragic consequences of this affliction if allowed to go untreated.  Apparently,  after numerous serial sexual encounters, blood stops circulating properly in the brain and judgement suffers.  In severe cases like Warren Beatty and Wilt Chamberlain, the victim loses the ability to count.

People who may fall victim to this malaise are fortunate to have facilities established to properly treat them.  Naturally, there can be no temptations of any sort at the facility that can cause the patient stress. 

As I understand it, there are two schools of thought on how to treat sex addiction.  The first is from the abstinence and avoidance path.  In this program, the facility is staffed by mainly hirsute males and the patient is exposed to nothing at all which has any hint of women.  They are allowed to watch entertainment including sports and news and certain TV shows like The View and Joy Behar.  As part of the therapy, men’s magazines are available, but all have been rigged to have full facial shots of Rosie O’Donnell and an embedded chip that shrieks “I WANT YOU NOW!” when opened.

The other school of thought is to overstimulate the patient with images and videos of comely gals every minute of the day from wake up to bedding down at night.  They are forced to watch videos of The Girls Next Door in a constant loop until they cannot bear to hear them say one more inane thing.  By the time 6 weeks are over, they will avoid busty blondes like they were E-Coli sandwiches.

We don’t know which method Tiger will endure, but we all pray he can recover.

link  US accused of ‘occupying’ Haiti as troops flood in – Telegraph.

Even in the midst of a great humanitarian operation, there’s still room for politics and political sensitivities.  Alain Joyandet, a French minister in charge of their relief effort,  in a fit of exasperation, accused the American contingent of an occupying operation and not a mercy mission.

While certainly preposterous, given the expeditious and generous response of the Americans compared to any other nation, this shows again how America cannot be the good guy in the eyes of the world.  The eloquent and charming Hugo Chavez expressed these same sentiments a few days ago as well.  France however, notionally an ally, should know better.

From way back in the late 1400’s when Chris Columbus and his gang showed up claiming things for Spain, to the French who started occupation in the early 1600’s to the late 1800’s, Haiti has had a long sordid history of slavery, of confiscation of resources, extinction of much of the native people and almost permanent poverty.  The short time that the U.S. occupied Haiti in the early 1900’s was a blink in time.

It’s widely known as a matter of fact,  that for all the years the European occupiers were there, no one thought to build any roads.  You’d think someone would think of this as they were carting away all the resources.  When the Yanks showed up, they put in the most extensive system of roads the nation had ever had.  Unfortunately, this was by mostly slave labor, but at least there was some attempt to build infrastructure.  So, for 20 some odd years, the Americans were in there, the French for over 200 and someone yelps “l’occupation!” As if.

But Americans are sensitive to this perception, heck the article even says that U.S. Marines are coached to carry their weapons discreetly and in an unthreatening way so as not to arouse historic sensibilities.  Really? Someone with serious wounds, no water and no food is going to complain about a guy with a gun providing security from looters and gangs?  Only cynical pinheads for whom politics is always paramount in their mentality can think this.  For their part, the Americans are acting like parents who have been accused of child beating so often, they go out of their way to be seen to act properly, walking on eggshells instead of just getting the job done.

In any event, why exactly would the Americans be interested in occupying Haiti?  It’s a country in a permanent state of chaos.  At the moment, even more than usual, there is anarchy.  The people are illiterate.  They are poor.  The big bull market in spices has come and gone.  There’s not even a lot of land involved. To step in would be to take ownership of the enormous challenges involved in bringing Haiti to decent modern standards, which means billions and billions of dollars as Carl Sagan used to say.  The only real advantage is to get a closer platform to slingshot spitballs at Hugo.

It would be nice to see France and Spain, two genuine former occupiers send in some real help to rebuild the country.  Send aid and money and maybe croissants, pass on the rhetoric.