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They’re Even Rewriting Fiction

November 12th, 2019 No comments

Source: Lashana Lynch will play 007 in new James Bond movie: report

According to this line from the linked story, the creators wanted to “to modernize the franchise criticized by many as being too dated and sexist.” I’ll bet Ian Fleming is shaking and stirring in his grave over what has happened to his original spy thriller stories.  As some may know, Fleming was a British intelligence officer operating in the uncertain world which was cold war Europe in the 1960’s. He likely drew from his experiences in the shadowy world of no holds barred espionage and embellished them with an active imagination to produce one of the most iconic characters in popular fiction and subsequently, the entertainment business.

As usually happens when commercial forces gets a hold of a successful franchise, the Bond mystique has morphed over the decades from being a daring cloak and dagger operator,  into the cartoon like character we now see over the past generations.  From a story line geared towards adults, the Bond franchise has devolved into films with video game like scenarios to appeal to the A.D.D. crowd.  Each film now has a gossamer thin plot line connected by 90 minutes of car chases, explosions, super human feats of agility and an exaggerated Bond insouciance.  It resembles Fast and Furious but with occasional tuxedos and evening gowns and fewer tattoos. It’s all about money.

The first crack in the franchise happened when they decided to cast Judy Dench as M.  Some may have noticed the disappearance of Miss Moneypenny over recent episodes, she of Bond groupie fame.  We definitely don’t see Bond slapping her on the butt as in the early days.  Having to write a subplot of an harassment suit into the show would destroy the flow of the narrative. Although, I can definitely see an LGBT person taking on that role in future films…or a robot…or an animal depending on the state of society by then.  In earlier episodes of the franchise, Bond had to often physically contend with brutish Slavic thugs in life and death hand to hand combat.  As time went on, the fights stretched a bit of credulity, taking on a video game-like feel, but now we are to believe that a slightly built woman will be just as good in such instances.  Okay….

We’re not really sure which audience this ‘freshened up’ franchise is supposed to address.  The latte sipping, vegan, gender confused, safe space, bicycle short wearing crowd shouldn’t be interested in someone employing duplicity, kung fu fighting and other assorted violence for the benefit of a nation…which they think is oppressive anyway. Bond used to be an agent working to further the aims of the West against a Communist East Bloc. What is Bond supposed to be fighting now? Brexiteers?

I’m not sure how gripping the narrative will be as the audience adjusts not only to a black female secret agent, but also to her driving a Tesla instead of an Aston Martin and drinking soy oatmeal smoothies instead of martinis.  On the other hand, given the PC environment and our modern reality, she may actually still be seducing women like Bond of old.  Though the plotline is not yet out, we can expect that her mission will include taking out plastic straw makers and global warming deniers.

The real world has experienced an Alice In Wonderland perversion of most every facet of normal life.  People are gaslit daily on what constitutes unimpeachable fact.  Even the most elementary observation of the sexes is now not so obvious.  Apparently sex is a social construct, not a biological fact.  As some wise guy noted, it’s amazing that throughout hundreds of excavations of ancient civilizations they’ve only ever encountered two sexes.  Suddenly in the past decade, there are dozens.  Apparently, crime is good, cops are now bad.  Single is good, families bad.  Hot days are proof of climate change; conveniently, so are cold days.  Maleness is oppressive, but males in female sports is ok.  I can go on.  That’s real life today and somehow we deal with it.

But novels and characters.  Leave them alone.  They are the product of someone’s imagination and they capture periods of history and reflect their cultural zeitgeist.  People can do whatever they choose to make current history, but leave the old stuff well enough alone.  The new breed of idiots are not just rewriting history, they’re rewriting fiction!