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Someone Hit The Lights!

October 28th, 2019 Leave a comment Go to comments

Source: Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi: Washington Post criticized for austere headline

There’s an old saying that goes, “when your adversary is digging himself into a hole, stand back and let him finish”.  The amusing headline from the Washington Post characterizing the death of the top ISIS leader at the hands of US forces was a backhoe’s worth of dirt, even considering the tons of earth they’ve moved over the years.  Wanting to be known as the beacon of truth, their masthead’s byline reads, “Democracy Dies In Darkness”.  Well someone had better find the light switch over there, because they seem to be vying with the satire of The Babylon Bee for the most preposterous headlines and stories.

The obituary reads, “Abu Bakr Al-Baghdadi, austere religious scholar at helm of Islamic State, dies at 48.”

We know that very soon, the meme machine will be working overtime on the internet to come out with some other re-writes of famous historical figures.

“Adolph Hitler, Thoughtful art collector and eloquent speechwriter found dead in apparent murder suicide with his wife Eva in the basement of his quiet home”

“Benito Mussolini, journalist, good friend of the art collector Adolf Hitler and respected leader of the Italian nation through the tumultuous years of World War 2,  passes away from assassination by disgruntled soldiers at the end of the war.  A public funeral was held at the Piazzele Loreto in Milan. He was only 61.”

“Mao Tse Tung, leader of the most populous nation on earth passed away at the young age of 82. He was an accomplished  demographics expert, managing to cull over 20 million people from the nation of China during his reign.  He commanded respect from his people and many in the nation took to wearing clothing that emulated his grey tunic during his life.  Actually, everyone did.  To this day, his ideology is celebrated by politicians, basketball players and actors in many western nations.”

“Jeffrey Dahmer, noted gastronomic adventurer, dies at the age of 34 while living in a state sponsored home.  He was apparently killed by a roommate in a dispute over differences of food tastes.”

“Pol Pot, leader of the Khmer Rouge dead at 63.  The Khmer Rouge pioneered the mass deployment of approximately 3 million people into the fields of the country to ease the stress upon the big cities.”

“The Washington Post, in the midst of a protracted death from massive declining readership and interest in fantasy literature.  The writing was on the wall when people stopped keeping birds and no longer required cage liners.”



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